Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I think I was hungry.

I was on this adventure, with my parents, a small child and the small child's anthropomorphic teddy bear. We were walking on a log in a swamp, the child fell in and I had to save it from this alligator. The alligator turned out to be perfectly amiable. On this adventure, we were working with these 3 people, one of them we knew was going to betray us. I don't remember much, but eventually we ended up in the no such agency. This tall skinny guy, a chef's apprentice, one of the guys we adventured with, stole my father's badge and was trying to get access to all the secrets. We had to stop him. The final confrontation was the chef's apprentice finding his mentor and having a battle in this giant kitchen. My father won. Then we all went out to eat and had a squabble about who owed what on the check.
Then, there was this race going on that anybody could join. We started, it was my grandmother, my mother, my sister and I, in our station wagon. The first part of the race, the first 2 miles or so, you had to obey the speed limit, but after that you're allowed to go as fast as your vehicle will let you. That's what we do, in this Mario Kart kind of way, weaving amidst all kinds of people and cars. Then I end up outside the vehicle. I learn that any sort of wheeled device is allowed, I see people with bikes, motorcycles, electric scooters, roller skates, whatever. I lament my lack of a device and start running. The route of this race goes alongside a river, looked a bit like the bike path along the Rhine, but with more trees. A bunch of cyclists had stopped for a picnic and a drink. I tried to steal what looked like an unused bike, but then this ten-year-old tried to convince me to trade it for his. These bikes had slots, you put an identity card (looked like an old game cartridge) into a slot above the front wheel, and it said whether the bike was yours. The card had the brand name of the bike on it. This ten-year-old had a card that could cheat those things and would say he owned whatever bike. But then this larger male comes up behind me and asks what I'm doing and could he have his bike back. He shows me his ID card which has the same brand name as the guitar. So does the ten-year-old's. but the new guy's card actually matches. I stutter something about thinking it was abandoned, he says it's ok, the ten-year-old leaves disappointed. I continue walking.
I eventually pass a smoothie stand, the first stand in what looks like a giant German fest, with food stands and music. I continue walking and I end up with my mom and sister in this cafeteria. I order pulled pork barbecue and fries, and the woman behind the counter (a black woman who was having trouble speaking) kept telling me to order cole slaw, but I kept not. Eventually I got the clue and did. My mother got a gyro, and looks sternly at me for ordering something unhealthy.
Then I wake up.

Friday, May 22, 2009

The location jumped around A LOT.

Aaaaaaaaaaaah, trying to remember
It was some kind of church service funeral thing, someone I didn't really know had died, but my mother had died recently, so I was upset when the funeral procession took place right next to her grave. Mel was with me. This Professor Mcgonagall type character said I was excused. We were suddenly indoors, inside St. Peters, I went to the pew where Mel was sitting. Then it turned into a train, and I was sitting with Mel and discussing the price of tickets. THEN I was on the picnic table in my backyard, with Mel and Rachael, talking about how many meanings the German preposition "an" has (fun fact, I could only remember 2.) This morphed into a classroom, I was sitting with a bunch of German students, but I was the only one who spoke German at all fluently, it was like German one. But in a science classroom. With whiteboards. I kept writing German phrases on the board, to the interest of the student I was sitting with.
Alarm went off, I woke up and turned over.
The next dream was like Run Lola Run, I was Lola, but instead of the same situation each time I was doing different things. I called my boyfriend just once to make sure he hadn't died. He laughed and said "What are you talking about?" I explained that it all had to do with this film.
Then I decided I had to get up for reals.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

HEAVILY influenced by House of Leaves

We were investigating this dark tunnel in my living room. Not the living room here, but the one in my house in Eltville, which made it creepier. Like in House of Leaves, we first entered with just some fishing wire, but it didn't go 2 miles, it only went about 20 feet. Luckily, around the 30-foot area, we entered this other room. It was about the size of my bedroom, with two doors in the opposite corner, and lit by two lamps on either side. A shelf was in the far corner. Like this.
__ _________________
<-^ doors ------------ shelf
| x lamp
|x lamp
| | Tunnel
| _ V ______________

On the shelf was a giant flashlight. I was freaked from the first tunnel, so I insisted we trade our small light for the big one. As we (I don't know who my companion was) took the flashlight down, Rachael came out of the door opposite the tunnel and asked what we were doing. I explained we wanted to explore the labyrinth. I voiced the problem of powering the giant flashlight. It was more of a spotlight than anything, it didn't run on batteries. Rachael reached up to the very top of the shelf (she's one of my shortest friends, y'know) and grabbed an extension cord. I insisted this wouldn't help very much, but she was like "y'know, it's something." The cord of the flashlight already stretched pretty far.
So we lugged this thing over to the other door, the one on the wall perpendicular to the tunnel, but when we tried to enter the door, my mysterious not-Rachael companion walked right into this wall of black stone. Rachael was like "Oh that's right, follow me!" and went through the other door. We followed her down this oak-panelled hallway. She removed the 3rd panel on our right to reveal the real tunnel entrance. We plugged the giant flashlight in and went on our way.
The tunnel wasn't as gigantic or hollow as the one in House of Leaves, it was more like the basement of Randolph, except black and lightless and no doors. We still needed the giant flashlight though, as without it it was so black we could not see. Eventually we find another door, and go through to find the basement of Saint Augustine's church in Wiesbaden. It's lit by a single candle. In the center of the room is this small hispanic toddler who introduces himself as Milo. We were asking him what he was doing here when I woke up.

The second dream was shorter, and involved Andrew Ballard and me sitting in a cafe discussing what hors d'oeuvres we should serve at Madeline's party. He suggested toquitos.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

I don't even like potatoes with cheese!

Katherine hired me and Andrew Ballard to do a job. I don't remember what it was, but we were hiding in a hotel to avoid completing it. Andrew was much smaller than me. He had a rose that was helping him lose weight, but also height. I laughed at him. He said the rose was a metaphor.
We ran into the Pendletons and Francises in a stairwell that reminded me of the church stairs, crossed with Randolph stairs. I told them about the job and we bitched about Katherine for a while. We went outside and stood out by a lamppost. It began to rain. A bus came up, and suddenly we had bags of stuff. My dream went back in time to the hotel again, when we were packing stuff up. Andrew disappeared and was replaced by Mel. I asked Mel how much stuff we'd need, whether I'd need to bring a separate bag for toiletries, etc. There was a bit of running through empty hallways, all hardwood floors and walls, lit by the sun and completely devoid of furniture or decoration of any kind. I stopped in this room that contained my mom, dad and grandmother. There were decorations in this room, an oriental rug, some nice chairs, lamps and candles, and a BIG piano. I stopped to play the piano, Meema commented on how we were actually hearing me play for once. Then mom and dad told me they needed to help Karen Ballard make potatoes with cheese. Not normal potatoes with cheese, it was like a checkerboard sheet of potatoes with cheese baked on it, and every potato square had a picture on it. The entire cast of LOTR was in one row of the thing, there were some other pictures I don't remember. There was a robot overseeing this work.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Stupid waitresses.

There was this woman and her husband, and the husband had a bunch of his friends over and was kind of ignoring the woman. She was not pleased with that. The husband said something about how she was a real witch, and all of the guys were drunk and laughed about that, but the woman had a book. She took a pinch of powder out of a purple draw-string bag and started flicking it at the guys. The husband was the first to inhale the powder, and he said sarcastically "Oh no, she's got me!" Eventually all of the men were infected. The powder made them think they were animals. One guy thought he was a gerbil, so he found a cage and sat in it. The men all ended up in a small room, the gerbil cage was on a table in the middle,the rest of the guys were on the floor, trying to think of a way to get back at the woman.
Then we all went to TGI Fridays, which had changed its menu. The waitress came by to take our drink orders. One woman (a different woman, but not different guys, though they'd stopped thinking they were animals) asked for iced tea, and the waitress was an idiot. "So you want tea in a Margarita glass with shaved ice?" "No, I don't want shaved ice." "You want hot tea in a Margarita glass?" "No" and it went on until the waitress thought of tea in a glass with ice cubes. The waitress informed us that the special was beef, and pointed at a sign with a picture of a cow wearing a bib and a hat. I tried to get a menu to look at what the choices were for having the beef prepared, but they were all being hogged at the other end of the table. The waitress returned and admonished me for not having my order ready.
I woke up hungry.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009


I was in the car with my mother, I was disappointed because I couldn't find my ipod and had to use my old CD player. The only CD I had was this obscure Beatles CD. We stopped at our house because my mother wanted me to change my shoes, so I switched the CD out for Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.
Party, Heather Lewis was there, she had on a "hug me if you are a ___" t-shirt (something I've never seen before in my life), so she was receiving lots of hugs. We sat at a long table. I was on a diet so I only ate salad.

Monday, May 11, 2009

My painting had a cat and a moon and a violin player.

EVERYONE did poorly on the statistics exam, so the professor decided to let us retake it. Except it was changed. And pretty much everyone on campus was taking it. We were in a building that was some cross between Seacobeck and Goolrick. There were tables all over with people crowded around them. We weren't supposed to take the exam together, but that didn't stop people. There were also beds everywhere. I went over to my bed (my dormroom bed, not the one I have here) and found Erin Kenderish there, filling out the exam like it was the easiest thing ever. I hadn't even looked at the exam, but when I did I found that it was unlike any exam I'd ever taken. Each person was given a copy of a painting, we had to copy the basic shapes of all of the items in the painting and describe each shape in mathematical terms. I was like "This isn't stats, it's geometry!" I sat down on my bed and snuck peeks at Erin's work. Then I fell asleep, and when I woke up (in my dream) my exam was gone. I went over to the table where the extras were, and was warned that I was running out of time. I was also offered cookies by some enthusiastic waitresses. I found Ballard and told him to help me. He said he would, but only if we could find someplace quieter because he couldn't concentrate in this room full of people shouting and eating. I said we could go to the locker room (goolrick, remember?). My parents jumped out of nowhere and accused us of sneaking off to have sex. I was completely disgusted, as was Andrew, but my parents didn't believe me so I just stalked off by myself to do this stupid math exam thing.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Bad thing to base your parenting style on.

It was my family from Ashland, and some ritualized honorable execution type things. I was having my head chopped off. I didn't like that, so I ran away, through a house, dragging Mel with me. We got to a body of water, with a kayak, a speedboat and a raft with a paddle. We found that the raft was the fastest mode of transport, so we took that. Then we were in a swimming pool, paddling around with some kids I don't know, some blond goth chick and a dude, we were competing with them in a race. Whoever won the race would get fed. They got the raft, we got the kayak, but we managed to knock them off the raft and steal it. We won the race and went inside to eat, we were starving. A tall woman with a bun and a tight dress led us to the dining room. She started complaining about her children. There was a missionary there, who was discussing his very flexible faith, and how he was very interested in the battle of Hastings. The woman said she based her parenting style on the battle of Hastings. There were pictures up on the wall of her children, they were moving around and yelling at each other. Their images turned into the Bayeux Tapestry, and I was very confused.
I "woke up", looked at my clock and saw it was 2:22 AM. I got up to go to the bathroom, but saw a huge and unpleasant shadow crawl across the floor. I turned on my light to look for the spider, but didn't find it, so I went back to bed and had another dream about rappers stuck in a canoe in the middle of the ocean.
Then I woke up for real.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The marriage thing was probably fueled by the Firefly episode Trash.

I'd been instant messaging this girl from the internet who I sort of knew, but not really. She was going to be in this part of the country, and wanted to visit and if possible stay overnight to save costs. I was nervous about this. We were still in Randolph 110, so I made up a lie about having to tell the RA a week in advance and it was just too late to arrange something. She cried and moaned, and eventually I agreed to pay for a motel for her and her friends (oh yeah, she was bringing friends) to stay in.
One of her friends called in advance to say if I had everything ready for the wedding, because this girl was expecting me to propose to her when she got there. Instead of being "I don't swing that way!" I acted like I expected this and said "No, I don't have a ring! I can give her this needlework I made her!" Then I remembered that Amanda had given me her engagement ring for safekeeping after Gray proposed. I thought "Maybe if I use it this once I can get whats-her-name (she was never named) to give it back to me before the wedding."
So I met her at the door, down on one knee and gave her the ring, but I never actually asked if she would marry me.
Let me describe the room we were in. Imagine for a sec Randolph 110. Only the bunk bed was back farther against the wall where the bathroom should be, and the bottom bunk was covered in a tarp. The door was over by Erin's bed, but Erin's bed was gone and a table with a lit candle on it was there in its place. Where my desk was there was a white couch, and where my bed was there was a hallway and a staircase.
Whats-her-face was excited to receive the ring, I explained the conditions of it and she said "That's fine! But why didn't you buy me my own?" I told her I didn't have enough money, but eventually I would. Her friend came rushing out of the hallway and said "We have to hide, your old boyfriend is after us!" to whats-her-face who I am now going to call Sandra because I'm sick of typing that. Sandra looked at me, horrified, and begged me to hide her. I winced because this would not be good if the RA found out, but I did anyway. I went over to the bunk bed and removed the tarp. The bed was hollow, and filled with all sorts of wires. It was divided into two parts, each as big as a coffin and stretching out towards the bathroom. Except the bathroom was no longer there, just a brick wall. So there were two compartments, filled with red and blue wires, each big enough for a person to lie down in. I put Sandra and her friend in these compartments. Suddenly they turned into Torg and Gwynn from Sluggy Freelance. I was outside the tarp but I could see what was going on inside. Gwynn (formerly Sandra) had to get her ipod shuffle through the compartment to Torg (formerly Sandra's female friend) before the guys got there. The shuffle was out of battery, so they worked out a way to charge it using the wires. The ipod had whalesong on it. The boyfriend burst in, with a bunch of guys with guns (he worked for the mafia) and demanded to speak to me. I sat down on the white couch and thought "The RA is going to KILL me!"
Then I woke up.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Space drugs. I'm pretty sure Dollhouse had something to do with us.

I was in Seacobeck, Stephen Colbert was running around and interviewing people about this new program for launching dead people into space. It was a big controversial thing. But since it was the only way to space travel, whole agencies had popped up (secret agencies, obviously) that would give you drugs to knock you out and make you seem dead, then you would get launched into space and you would wake up in time to see space and then make it down to earth. We thought that was really cool, so we went for it. While my father paid the people, my sister, mother and I went into this room. There was a square table in the middle of the room, and on the table were piles of clothes. Each had a label with a person's name on it, and under the first layer of clothing were some syringes, containing special drugs that were formulated based on the individual's medical history. I walked around the table and couldn't find my name, and started yelling at people. After my mother went to ask the people, I looked underneath my sister's clothing and found mine. This still pissed me off, but my sister was already rather pissed. "How do you know I haven't switched the drugs out?" she said before launching into a diatribe about what the drugs actually do and how this is going to be so cool.
We put on our clothes and stepped outside, where people were boarding a boat. The boat went across some water to an island, on which there was a rocket. I was wondering how we were going to board the boat, when we were supposed to be dead. A few coffins were people loaded onto the boat, all followed by people in black clothing, obviously a funeral party. We were directed to our right, where we would take our drugs and put ourselves to sleep, be loaded into the coffins and carried onto the boat, then onto the rocket.
My sister asked how we'd manage to do this without onlookers. I asked how we were going to redirect the rocket back to Earth, if the whole point of launching a body into space was to conserve ground space normally spent burrying them. Everyone around me looked rather worried at that question, the undertakers grinned rather suspiciously, and I woke up.